Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Did Someone Rewrite the Rules of Common Decency? Or "Have a Nice F*#king Day

I must have missed the revised edition of the book of manners wherein it defines respect and common courtesy.   Apparently, some guy I met yesterday did get the newly published rules, and proceeded to show me shove them down my throat.

Here's how it went down, you be the judge.  Should I go back and kiss this guy's ass as he requested of me, or should I have kicked his ass, or just let it go as I did.

I was deep in thought about nothing and imbibing in the fresh crisp air of very early Autumn, fishing the top of a run where a number of trout were rising softly to take tiny blue-winged olives off the surface.  The long pool above me was empty as far as the eye could see - 150 yards at least.  Below me, about 50 yards downstream, was a friend who had joined me in the quiet pursuit of fishing tiny flies in low, very clear, gently flowing water to wary trout.  The only sounds were the soft raindrop-on-water sounds of fish sipping in the minutiae and song birds on the wing overhead.

I had just taken a small wild brown trout on an emerger when someone walked up the trail past me and proceeded to fish from the edge of the water at the lower end of the pool above me.  No problem there, he must be going to work his way up through the long,empty riffle/pool.  Plenty of fish in there.

Instead he worked his way downstream, eventually swinging his wet flies through the water I was fishing.  At first I ignored him, thinking he can't be that stupid that he thinks its okay to fish over me.  Maybe he was going to stop after making a few passes.  But no, not only did he keep fishing downstream, before long he was fishing within 25 feet of me. Not cool, not necesary.

So, I asked him if he was going to keep fishing downstream.  He ignored me and even made a cast right over my line.  I then said, "I guess you are going to ignore me as though I am not here."

Without looking up, he said he was just fishing his water and moving downstream. 

His water.  His WATER.  As though anyone else that might happen to be fishing should move aside for him.

I didn't move and before long he realized I wasn't going to. So he reeled in and hitched up the bank and started walking downstream just above me.  He then yelled, "Have a nice f*#king day!"

I looked up at him, and said calmly, "Are you kidding me?  I then continued to cast.

"Are you trying to intimidate me?" he yelled.  "What is that?"

I ignored him, and thought, What the hell is he talking about?

"Who the f*#k are you?  There are miles of river and you have to fish here!"  he had the balls to say. 

I turned and said, "Are you serious?  Do you think I should have moved on when you came?  You're nuts!........You need to learn some manners."

He then waited until he had walked some distance and then told me to, "Kiss my ass!"

I looked toward him and said in as sweet a tone as I could, "Okay."

"Jackass!" Was his only response......which he repeated as he walked down past Chris.

He then stepped in just downstream of Chris and again mumbled something about the jackass.  I then asked Chris if he was still using a bugger (woolley bugger fly), to which Chris loudly said, "No, I think there are enough BUGGERS in the gorge today!"

Touche'.................and have a nice day.


Unknown said...

ah, we're getting old my friend.

I'm slowly learning that I can't win with these types of folks. The Big Gunpowder, where I'll be later tonight, is full of the same a-holes as the Raritan's choice spots.

I had 2 idiots fish right into me 3 weeks in a row up there this summer. Same 2 old crazy a-holes. I pee'd on their door handles in the parking lot before I left the last time.

Have a nice day.

FoulHooked said...


thats all i got

Anonymous said...

I dont know what is wrong with people out there anymore ,it is like the fishing world has gone retart ,i dont get it ,I had the same thing happen to me on the dechutes twice in one day

Anonymous said...

Well stated Matt...I was wondering if you were going to post about this ass.